Long time

I haven't blogged in ages, and I decided to re-kindle the love between me and the internet after I realised my mind was becoming boggled with stupid thoughts and ideas that needed to be written down and read by lurkers.

I have recently become extremely hormonal, to the point where I am constantly arguing with my man about the stupidest shit that could ever be imagined. And I cry at the smallest things e.g. Independence Day was on channel nine a few nights ago, and the first lady died. I cried. So much. I CRY OVER FICTIONAL CHARACTERS DYING, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!
And, I threw a scrunched up paper ball at the bin and missed. I may, just may, have cried. Oh, and I lost against Welshman in car racing on PS1 annnnd then we played Tony Hawk's and I kind of fail at video games so...yeah, I may have gone ape-shit.
So this begs the question; "what the hell is wrong with me?"


I have come to the conclusion, that I am a woman.
Yes, that's right, I have a vagina and we are best friends and I'm whipped. She controls my life. I hate her so much. I wish I could be a boy, and be all "Oh, she didn't call me back. Meh, back to watching porn." *scratches scrotum* (Sorry, I know that's a bit harsh considering some of you don't watch porn and some of you may cry if your lady didn't ring you back, but you know, stick with me here).
But I cannot (if and when I get a scrotum, perhaps then). Instead, I have to do this;
"Oh, he didn't call back...maybe...maybe he doesn't like me anymore? OMG, HE TOTALLY MET SOME ONE ON THE INTERNET! FUCK HIM! HE BETTER NOT HAVE CHEATED ON ME!....Why hasn't he called back, it's been 10 minutes....should I call him? No, I don't want to be annoying...maybe I should let it ring once then hang up...no, no, he'll see right through that..."
And so on until I end up disillusioned as to what is REALLY happening which is that he forgot.
I bet you're real happy to have a vajay-jay right now, aren't you girls? Yeah.

Although, the one amazing thing about not having a penis, is being able to walk ten meters without fiddling or touching your genitalia. A man walked into a bar....no, just kidding. A man walked into my work today, on the phone, smiled at me and then proceeded to scratch and jiggle...AND JIGGLE...his willy and family jewels while I stood there smiling back. Can you not? Could you at least turn and face the wall, a corner perhaps, and do it there? I don't want to see your man bits dancing around in your loose knickers. Hideous.
Unless, of course, guys enjoy show casing their flaccid dicks to the general public. If that's the case, by all means, don't let me stop you. Follow your dreams. You may eventually even reach stardom. Go on Australia's Got Talent. Go. Do it. Go. Just go.

So really, if you're either sex, you've got hell annoying traits. So unless you're a Lady Ga-ga, you're screwed. That's all I can say. Boys can get so egotistical aswell. Egotestical. Ha. Men.

Oh the joys of life

So this is the new year,
And I don't feel any different.

Yes, Death Cab, I agree completely. I am feeling pretty average right now, but my mind has been blown to smithereens (heh Smithers) because I have just witnessed the miracle of Special Effects that is Avatar. Brilliantly executed and sucked me right out of my chair and into Pandora. Although we had trouble discussing the movie afterward because we couldn't quite grasp the name of the characters except the main guy who had the most generic english name of "Jake", so everyone else was refered to as "Jake's Girlfriend", "Mum Lady", "Dad Guy" and "Giant Dinosaurs". We are a creative generation ( :

Yes and my New Years Eve was a big pool of drama-drama made entirely out of friends' tears. It was okay in the end I suppose? I am surrounded by love triangles at the mo and am so greatly grateful that I myself am not trapped in this Bermuda kind of situation.
I hope all turns for the better because I am not really coping with this "comfort-your-friends" kind of thing which I am generally real good at. I suppose I've become slightly disconected and cold-hearted after my own drama-drama. Apologies in advance if I fail hard at this, dear friends, I am trying my darn hardest and you should all just kiss and make up with your respective kissing-person and be happy.

<3

May these shackles free you

Work again tomorrow *sigh*, I hope it's not busy. I enjoy fucking around and doing nothing except picking the carrots out of the jalapeno bain, not sweating up a storm in my unwashed Sub shirt and visor with shitty dummy customers complaining about their $10 sandwich.
I like purposely reaching for the wrong salad choice, realllllllllllly slowly and watch their faces escalate in disgust as my hand reaches closer to the vegetable.
"Everything except chilis and pickles."
*Puts everything except chilis and pickles*
*Slowly reaches for the chilis with shakey hand*
*customer's face= :S....:|.....:O!.....>:O!*
"I SAID NO CHILIS!!!"
Seriously, calm down, it's a Goddamn sandwich for Buddha's sake.
"OH PLEASE, NOT THE CARROTS, ANYTHING BUT THE CARROTS! D:"
Dickhead.
Oh, and for those tub-tubs that come in thinking they're doing themselves a favour by coming into Subway for a "healthy" meal and ordering a sub with double cheese, double meat and extra bacon with no salads and ten sauces; please stop kidding yourselves.

Ahhhhhhhhh life is good. I finished buying presents and got a haircut. All that is needed now is a good dose of op-shopping and lip piercing : D!
Woohoo!
AND THEN IT'S CHRISTMAS.
AND THEN IT'S MY BIRTHDAY.
AND THEN IT'S BDO.
AND THEN I GET MY BRACES OFF.
....and then year 12 starts....

Zzzzzzzzz..

So over everything.
I would love to curl up into the fetal position and sleep for a week right about now.
Have been working so much and have had no sleep and no time to do anything.
The money I earned is being spent on other people for Christmas and I'm super grumpy because I've been wanting to go scout out the Good Sammy's near me but haven't had the time or the money to do it....or anything at all for that matter.
*sigh*, needs epic cheering up D:
Going to have a Nana nap.....

Baby, did you forget to take your meds?

Spun. says:
I love wasabi
Diego says:
i love wasabi too
i love chillies
Spun. says:
me too
I love spicy things
Diego says:
WEIRD!!!!!!!!
Spun. says:
NO!
NORMAL!
Diego says:
YOUR NOT NORMAL, WHEN WILL YOU LEARN THAT MIKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spun. says:
OKAY OKAY D:

Just some more proof, that I will never fit the term "normal".

Can I just say that if you eat Subway non-stop for a week with extra jalapenos in every Sub you consume, the consequences are dire. My, my, my, the bowel movements in this little girl have been incredible. . . . . . . Incredibly bad D:
Ask Welshman, the poor lad. His nose now looks like Voldemort's.


"THE HELL IS THAT SMELL!?"

That would be my buttocks saying OHAI! :D

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away...

now it looks as though they're all here to stayyyyyy
oh, I believe in yesterday.....

Been singing it in mah head for agessss and "Ding fries are done, ding fries are done, ding fries areeeeee dooooooooooooonnnnnnnneeeeeee" heh.
Watching Family Guy right now actually. If Peter was real I'd definitely shoot him in the mouf. He's funny now, in the form of cartoon, 2D, harmless and tubby, but dear God, if he were real. No way in hell is he getting the advantage of speach, uh uh.

Mmmmmmmmm Christmas shopping makes little Asian heppy ( : I love buying stuff for people, and OH.MAH.BUDDHA. I have the best wrapping paper in the history of wrapping paper. It looks like furry wallpaper. AWESOME. I love wrapping presents. I love everything about Christmas except it's religious side. I am a hopelessly hopeless Christmas Consumer...I've been sucked into the materialistic side of this holiday....you should be grateful kids, you're going to get the best presents evarrrr. I feel like shit if some one buys a better present than the one I've given.
Eg.
"YOU GOT ME A TICKET TO BDO!?"
"HELLZ YEAH I DID!"
"Oh....well Jenny bought me BDO tickets with a backstage pass and a free grope of Lily Allen's boobs."
"Well fuck Jenny!"

Yeah, that's something that'll happen to me.
BUT NOT THIS YEAR MOTHER FUCKERS!
AURGHHH! D:<